The last four weeks

Or: "Why I suck at blogging, in bullets"

Although I have about six really excellent posts half written, life seems to be getting in the way of well...just about everything. My life is nothing short of a joke, lately, people. Seriously. A joke. A few of the occurrences that have kept me from the computer:

• First and foremost, a beautiful, wonderful baby. We had a rough few weeks but now that we passed the six week growth spurt life is back to easy with him. Except that he no longer sleeps. Like Ever. As in, our longest stretch without sleep was 17 hours without even closing his eyes for a five minute nap. I nearly poked my own eyes out. Except that it's hard to poke your eyes out with a 2 month old smiling lovingly at you.


• I developed a very lovely incisional infection EIGHT WEEKS post partum. Eight Weeks. Seriously. Oral antibiotics didn't work. I'm allergic to the 2 classes that would actually work. So ..my options were 1) take an oral that I was allergic to 2) be hospitalized for IV antibiotics 3) attempt IV antibiotics at home. I opted to try the one I was allergic to and broke out in a huge rash about an hour after I took the first pill. Because of the item directly below, hospitalization and/or having an arm out of commission for an IV was out of the question. So I'm currently treating the infection with a peroxide wash and hoping for the best. As in ...hoping I don't end up in the ICU septic or something. It seems to be holding it's own right now.


• Monk fell off a roof at work and broke his back in two places. The good news is that he's alive, can walk, and has control of all of his own bodily functions. The bad news is that he 1) can't work 2) can't do anything else. He's in a brace that limits movement, has a 5 pound weight lifting restriction, and can't bend or twist ever. If you're particularly astute, you'll note that my brand new baby weighs 13 pounds (because he's a moose). So ..I now have 2 babies. I felt less like a single mom when I was a single mom. Honestly. To say that it's overwhelming to have him out of the running for helping with anything - a single diaper change or nighttime waking - is a tremendous understatement. To describe the stress of your husband asking you to tie his shoes while you're nursing a baby and trying to online shop for a teenager's birthday? Umm...I don't think I can. These restrictions are in effect for a minimum of 12 weeks. The baby will be nearly 6 months old before his dad can hold him again.


• I picked the baby up out of the crib about a week after Monk broke his back. It hurt. A lot. In the morning I quite literally couldn't sit, stand, or walk because of the unbelievable pain in my back. My mom had to come and rescue me. She literally held the weight of the baby so that I could nurse him. It was awful. I finally made my way to the MRI machine to discover that I herniated a disc, tore 2 others, and pinched a major nerve. Umm. If you want to think about stress? Think about the fact that now the only one in my family that can tie their own shoes is my now 14 year old.


• The dog - who has severe hip dysplasia - somehow managed to fracture her left elbow. She requires not 1, but 3 surgeries, at $2500/pop. And she can't walk. She needs to be carried in and out of the house to use the bathroom. See above for the family members that can safely do that.


• This is my last week of maternity leave. Can't. even. think. about. that.


• Prior to Monk's injury, I didn't know how to turn on the vacuum or where we kept the garbage bags. For reals. He does that much around the house. He did, I should say. Because his name is MONK, he still expects the house to be in that very neat and hyperclean orderly state. We've had many issues because umm...I'm not the type to vacuum while holding and nursing a new baby with a herniated disc in my back. He is, surprisingly to me, not understanding that.


• The golden child starts high school one week from tomorrow.

Normally? Any one of the above items would throw me for a loop. Currently? I'm getting very close to requesting an in patient psych admission. I'm a wreck. When I'm no longer a wreck? I'll get back to posting my happy posts about all things nursing, pumping 101, and the beauty of a good photographer.

Until then? I'll try and keep my focus on the little man on top. He is my angel. Seriously. I think he's the cutest thing ever.